It’s been months, I’ve suppressed every bit of anger and sadness that I’ve been feeling towards life. I no longer know the meaning of “take one pill before bed”
I mean why would I? On one hand I’m trying my best to not have a seizure but on the other hand I’m angry that I ever had one. The world tells you that you’re supposed to be strong, get through it, it’s gonna be okay? But no, I have all this bitterness waiting to break out and shout that it’s not gonna be okay and I no longer know how to be strong and get through this, so yes I may have developed a substance abuse problem, I may have stopped feeling any kind of positivity towards living, but I’m silent because I feel like maybe I don’t get to talk about my issues, maybe the days go by and I’m gonna feel the same shit and no one will understand it but me.
Because at the end of the day, after every seizure, emotional breakdown, the low to my high, I’m awake staring at the ceiling and nothing makes sense, but my pain.
Chaotic Virgo💤 